Fosters and Kronenbourg have just got even better. And it’s all down to widgets. They’re back. It’s official. I heard an advert promoting them this morning and a quick check in Asda confirmed their presence. In fact, they’ve been back for two weeks-where have I been to miss all the excitement?
Of course, they don’t actually want to call them widgets, as they’re old hat and everyone knows they are pants. Hence we have Fosters with in-can scuba, and Kronenbourg 1664 with Dynamo Systeme. The marketing team really excelled themselves with that brainstorming exercise. Apparently, there are fewer bubbles, and they are smaller, resulting in a smoother taste. I think that means even less taste. Which, if true, is some achievement considering the products in question. And the consumer will only be expected to pay an extra 50-80p per 4 pack for this privilege. A bargain! Seriously, I can see the numptys who buy these falling for this latest swiz. Only one thing puzzles me. You are reminded to serve these cans extra cold to get the full effect of the widgets. Surely lager drinkers put their cans in the fridge and serve them as cold as possible already? I’ve never met a lagerboy complaining his can was too cold and could it be warmed up please.
I was going to illustrate this article with a picture of the aforementioned products, but I think we already see too much of them. So just use your imagination.