Thanks to the Pub Curmudgeon for drawing my attention to the recent attack on Wetherspoons. There seems to be a growing trend of bloggers attacking “soft targets”, although the Spoons conundrum has been a bone of contention for some time. To say “They're a big part of Britain's problem drinking culture” is pure nonsense. For one thing, they simply aren’t big enough to have that sort of influence, even if they do sell proportionally large amounts of beer. I tend to avoid my local one simply because it’s poorly run and I can easily get to better pubs. However, there is nothing wrong with their premise and name-calling of them wholesale smacks of beer snobbery.
Speaking of which, it appears I’m one. I know what you’re thinking-what you, Tyson? The anarchist beerhound? The class warrior? Yes. Thanks to a tip-off, I see that antipodean blogger Tim is still (trying) to put me down. “Pure beer snobbery. A bit like that Tyson blogger.” Hmmm.
The problem with Timmy is that he doesn’t like criticism. Even the mildest questioning of his somewhat bizarre theories will earn you a Stalinist labelling. And may Vishnu help you if you actually dare to disagree with him. First you’ll be dismissed as a Camra reactionary. And if that label doesn’t fit, you’ll be castigated as a little Englander, as bad as if you were Camra. You obviously don’t appreciate or understand foreign beer-otherwise you’d agree with him.
But hold on, Tyson, you haven’t got a drop of English blood in you, have you, I hear you say. Aren't you the direct descendant of bloodthirsty cossacks? Haven’t you pissed out more Polish lager than Timbo has ever dreamt of? Ah but grasshopper, he is an outsider who asks questions no one else has. Well maybe some of us did twenty years ago, but hey, some people like reinventing the wheel.
Some might even say, it’s a bit rich of someone drinking in the poncy suburbs of London, who lives, in his words, in a “posh village”, to persistently call you a “beer snob." Especially when you’re out there in the real world, drinking in the real pubs, day in and day out. You might say that-but I couldn’t possibly comment.
In the words of John Lennon
"And you think you're so clever and classless and free, But you're still fucking peasants as far as I can see."